The British Are Coming

The British Are Coming
The Broken Pitcher
The Jewel Casket
The Kitchen Maid
¡¡¡¡`You rogue! you traitor! Jo, how could you?' cried the three girls, as Snodgrass led her friend triumphantly forth; and, producing both a chair and a badge, installed him in a jiffy. ¡¡¡¡`The coolness of you two rascals is amazing,' began Mr. Pickwick, trying to get up an awful frown, and only succeeding in producing an amiable smile. But the new member was equal to the occasion; and, rising, with a graceful salutation to the Chair, said, in the most engaging manner, `Mr. President and ladies - I beg pardon, gentlemen - allow me to introduce myself as Sam Weller, the very humble servant of the club.' ¡¡¡¡`Good! good!' cried Jo, pounding with the handle of the old warming-pan, on which she leaned. ¡¡¡¡`My faithful friend and noble patron,' continued Laurie, with a wave of the hand, `who has so flatteringly presented me, is not to be blamed for the base stratagem of tonight. I planned it, and she only gave in after lots of teasing.' ¡¡¡¡`Come now, don't lay it all on yourself; you know I proposed the cupboard,' broke in Snodgrass, who was enjoying the joke amazingly. ¡¡¡¡`Never you mind what she says. I'm the wretch that did it, sir,' said the new member, with a Welleresque nod to Mr. Pickwick. `But on my honour I never will do so again, and henceforth devote myself to the interest of this immortal club.' ¡¡¡¡`Hear! hear!' cried Jo, clashing the lid of the warming-pan like a cymbal. ¡¡¡¡`Go on, go on!' added Winkle and Tupman, while the President bowed benignly. ¡¡¡¡`I merely wish to say, that as a slight token of my gratitude for the honour done me, and as a means of promoting friendly relations between adjoining nations, I have set up a post-office in the hedge in the lower corner of the garden; a fine, spacious building, with padlocks on the doors, and every convenience for the mails - also the females, if I may be allowed the expression. It's the old martin-house; but I've stopped up the door, and made the roof open, so it will hold all sorts of things, and save our valuable tim. le. Letters, manuscripts, books, and bundles can be passed in there; and, as each nation has a